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Keith is a rare and exotic specimen

Keith was ill at the beginning of the month. Here is an extract from an email he sent to a colleague.

On Tuesday night we went bell ringing. We have 8 bells in Monmouth so ideally we want 8 ringers. Our full complement is 9 but many miss practice for various reasons and one ringer hates to ring with only 4 because there is not much you can do.

I rang for the first 10 minutes or so until a sixth ringer arrived. She is a nurse in a local practice and is always a bit late.

I then lay down on a pew with a kneeler as a pillow and probably went to sleep. The other ringers were concerned about me and persuaded my wife to go and see if I was OK.

She asked if anyone had a phone to ring Cardiff.

When they asked why, she explained my body is to go for medical experimentation to Cardiff Medical School but I have to die within 40 miles of Cardiff and Monmouth is within 40 miles.

She woke me up - and so deprived Cardiff Medical school of a rare and exotic specimen - at least for now!!!!!

Alex has full access to anything you need if my wife pursues the Cardiff Medical School option!!!!!

Keith's cutting through the Jargon at Standard Life

ONLY the wrap [ which is expensive] is staying with Standard Life Aberdeen. Anything else you are told is "rep speak " as told by their bosses! for example

"Off-platform products Both Standard Life Aberdeen and the Phoenix Group are committed to helping you support your clients with their life savings. All off-platform product servicing will be provided by the Phoenix Group. You and your clients can expect to receive the same high standards of customer service post completion of the deal as you do today; as the servicing teams who look after you and your clients today will be the same people; they will simply move to the Phoenix Group.

The Standard Life brand is almost 200 years old and is one of the most recognised in the UK long-term savings industry. It has a strong reputation built on high levels of service. It is very important for Standard Life Aberdeen and the Phoenix Group that, through the strategic partnership, we maintain the experience expected of the "Standard Life" brand."

Finally, some wag in the City reckons Britain could be turning into a ‘banana republic’. Why? Well, it is incredibly hot, it has a football team that has done well in the World Cup and lastly, has a government in turmoil.

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